Ali's Story: Finding Identity in Others
Name: Ali Moore
Where I am in life: I’m a senior at Liberty University studying behavioral sciences and religion with a minor in women’s leadership. After college, I’m hoping to get married and start a life of ministry in the local church. The Lord has given me a desire to open up an art & theater afterschool program for at-risk teenagers to keep them off the streets, and in the future, I would love to start a multi-ethnic, multi-generational women’s conference.
My Passions & Hobbies: having deep conversations about the Word & people’s walks with the Lord, anything relating to art and creativity, mentoring girls younger than me, speaking and communicating God’s Word
Spiritual Gifts: Teaching, Leadership, Exhortation
Favorite Bible Verse: 2 Corinthians 3:4-6
When & how did you come to know Christ as your Savior? I grew up in a Christian home, but I never really grasped how much the Lord loved me when I was younger. After experiencing sexual abuse as a child, I developed an eating disorder and battled with a lot of bullying until high school. When I was a sophomore in high school, I fell into a deep depression and started self-harming, and it was through that time that the Lord literally saved me from myself. One night I was about to take my life, and I had this weird urge to pray and said, “Lord, if you have a plan for my life, show me.” And ten seconds later, the song on my phone changed to “How He Loves,” and for the first time in my life, I realized I was loved by the Creator of the universe. My life has never been the same since then.
After you gave your life to Christ, what was the hardest struggle you went through & how did you overcome it? The hardest thing I’ve faced since giving my life to Christ happened in my sophomore year of college, when I went through an extremely abusive dating relationship. They guy had convinced me that he was a godly person and that he wanted to be a pastor. However, his actions did not line up with his words. He was very manipulative and controlling and made me feel like I was worthless. After dating for almost a year and being pushed up against walls and locked in cars, I realized that this was not the abundant life God had called me to live, so I broke up with him. My view of self-worth and identity was shattered, but through that break up, I dove into God’s Word and found that true intimacy comes from time spent with Jesus. Through that bad season, I found that my identity is only found in Christ alone.
What is one thing you feel like the Lord has laid on your heart to share with the Simple Pursuit Community? True freedom and satisfaction cannot be found in anything other than Christ. The sooner that you realize this, the sooner you will be able to boldly walk in what the Lord has called you to.
There was a time in my life where I had this best friend, and I believed that we would be best friends for life. I put all of my identity in our relationship, and I banked my future off of us doing ministry together and fulfilling so many other dreams together. It wasn’t until I realized she had lied to me about some major things that I realized I found my identity in that relationship rather than in Christ. I had literally put my entire life into this relationship and into what she could do for me and with me. We had planned our weddings together, wanted to write a book together, plan a women’s conference together, and so much more.
But when I found out she had been lying to me, the Lord stripped me of the idea of who I was going to be in my future. I realized I had been trying to control my future myself with her by my side instead of the Lord. It was through losing that friendship, that the Lord showed me that if your identity is based in another person, whether it’s a friendship or a relationship, they will fail you.
Close relationships aren’t bad, but when you begin to idolize them, that’s when it becomes a problem. Matthew 6:33 tells believers to "seek first the kingdom." It’s only through fixing our eyes on Jesus that we can have meaningful and beneficial relationships.
How do you know when you’re basing your identity in another person? Ask yourself these questions:
Do I prioritize their opinion over the Lord’s?
Who do I turn to first when I have a problem? Do I turn to my friend or significant other first, or do I go to the Lord in prayer?
Do I seek to spend more time with them than I do with the Lord? If you don’t seek to spend time with the Lord first, then most likely, your priorities are out of line.
The way that you can keep from idolizing people in relationships is by maintaining a steadfast relationship with the Lord and praying without ceasing. Finally, always prioritize spending time with the Lord before you spend time with any other person each day.